Ground Zero, Building Self Confidence

If you’re needing to build self confidence, there’s only one place to start from… Ground Zero. You can travel to far away, exotic places, looking for a good place to build… Africa, Istanbul, Monaco or Cleveland, but you won’t find it. Self confidence building lots are only found in one place…Yourself.

Nothing replaces a strong, humble sense of self confidence within. If someone tells me their self confidence is low or non existing, I assure them they have all they need to build their self confidence to soaring new heights.

Many people say the hardest part is knowing how to get started. From my life’s experience, speaking as a person who has been below Ground Zero in the self confidence department at times and felt able to leap the Empire State building at others, let me share few hints that help me.

PUMP UP THE VOLUME!  Listen to the noise going on inside your head. Do you like what you hear? Does it fill you with self confidence? If you love what you’re listening to, BRAVO! If not, you need to make some self confidence changes.

I’m a big fan of lists… Writing things down so they are in my face. Write down what you want to hear. For  instance, weight is a sensitive issue for many people. It can be a self confidence killer. Instead of telling yourself you are overweight, make it positive.

Tell yourself you appreciate the body you’ve been given.  It deserves good food and exercise to keep it healthy. Write this down and read it until it becomes an automatic thought.

You’ve changed criticism into something positive, an automatic self confidence booster.  Not only does positive feel good, we are more inclined to listen to it. Who wants to hear negative things about ourselves?

SET GOAL TIMES!  We can all set goals, but achieving them is the challenge. Not reaching a goal is another self confidence killer. What really helps me is writing down a goal, breaking it up into smaller goals and then set time frames for those smaller goals.

Making small goals and putting a time limit on them helps us  stay focused and our self confidence soars when we achieve it! That feeling helps us keep the motivation to continue on with the next small goal. Sooner than you think, your main goal is right in front of you! And oh, what a feeling!

BE PRESENT IN LOVE. Whatever it is that you love, be there when you are in its presence. Your spouse, your children, your pets, your hobbies.

I don’t have any children of my own, but I absolutely adore my nieces and nephews. When I am spending time with them, my mind, my heart, my soul has their full attention… There is nothing else.

I bask in their light and it fills me with the most wonderful feelings… Feelings that carry me through challenging experiences.  I draw energy and hope from the very thought of them, and for reasons I don’t understand, they are my biggest source of self confidence.

And the biggest for last…

BE ACCOUNTABLE! This can be a tough one.  Folks hear “accountability” and they instantly think “blame.” That’s not at all what accountable is about.  Accountability is about personal power and responsibility… The very core of our self confidence.

So many of us give our personal power away because we are afraid of accepting responsibility for our own life.  But responsibility gives you power to create everything you wish for in life.

The individual who is responsible is the one who calls the shots. I don’t want anybody but me calling the shots in my life.  Do you?

Being accountable simply means you accept the consequences of your actions and choices. For fun, let’s change the word consequences to creations…Try saying it out loud. Feels more positive, right?

Grasping the idea that accountability is going to fuel your personal power and enable you to create the life you wish for is a huge step. Don’t be hard on yourself, be proud of yourself for trying! Building self confidence takes time, as any true change does.

As you make efforts to own your choices, you will slowly feel more confident with yourself. Embrace accountability! Embrace responsibility! Your creations from doing this will be whatever you want them to be… Good or bad. I say go for good.



  1. Ronnie Boniface says:

    As always great writing on self confidence !

    • As always, thank you… I’m glad you enjoyed it. For me, self confidence is one of those things in life we can never have too much reminding of it’s importance. If my self confidence is low, I don’t get a darn thing accomplished, and more importantly, I don’t believe that I can.

      Happy 4th of July weekend! Hope all is well with you and your family. Lots of love to all XOXO

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