We Can Be Our Own Worst Enemy

CourseCoverNotebook3A neighbor told me about Stacey Alcorn.  She is an author and motivational speaker, and he had been to one of her motivational seminars.  After reading about her and checking out her different websites, I’m hooked.

I’ve written about the same things she practices in many of my articles, my book and my self improvement course. But it was so inspiring to see someone using the same practices and beliefs in their own life, and they worked! And even though she faced some pretty large learning curves along the way, it did not matter.  She is living the life of her dreams!

I wanted to share an article of her’s with you entitled Four Ways You Are Your Own Worst Enemy.  It can apply to business, relationships, health…any aspect of life.  And as I read it, my tush got kicked.  Read it, and see how you feel and what you think when you’re done.

Four Ways You Are Your Own Worst Enemy

Having been an entrepreneur for the better part of two decades, I’ve come to learn a thing or two about how my mindset contributes to or detracts from my business.

The one person that we all talk to throughout the day is ourselves. We hold conversations with, ask questions to and make observations to ourselves all day long.

I have found that my own inner dialogue acts as a catalyst to propel my business to higher levels and also at times has been the monkey wrench that grinds it to a halt. Here are the four ways that you could very well be self-sabotaging your business:

  1. Poor affirmations.

Twenty years ago I was building a thriving mortgage business. I was making money hand over fist while helping hundreds of people a year buy homes they loved.

By age 30, I had built a big, beautiful house, owned two expensive sports cars and had enough money to retire.

Yet by age 35, I had lost most of it and ended up moving into an investment property I owned. It didn’t take me long, though, to get back on my feet and eventually I built a huge real estate empire.

I constantly evaluate what I did wrong to have lost everything once so that I’ll never do it again.

One reason I lost everything the first time was I used poor affirmations. As I built my mortgage business from scratch, I’d remind myself, “I came from nothing. I’d be OK with nothing,” as if preparing myself to lose it all.

I constantly told myself that I’d be totally alright without wealth and all the things that came with it. And  the universe gave me exactly what I expected.

Today I use affirmations to propel me forward. I say, “Today I am going to meet the right people at the right time for the betterment of my business and my life.” I don’t expect to lose anymore. I have a winning mindset and affirmations to go with it.

  1. Not being there now.

The mindset of “I will” rather than “I am” can be equally self-sabotaging. For example, a dialogue that goes, “I will own the largest real estate firm in Massachusetts that will help 20,000 families a year buy and sell real estate” is different from one that affirms, “I own the largest real estate firm in Massachusetts helping 20,000 families a year buy and sell real estate.”

I have found that telling myself I will do something is the same as telling myself that I’m not doing that now.

So today I live as if I have already accomplished my goal. When your subconscious already believes that you’re the person you wish to be, goals are accomplished in double time.

  1. Killer words. 

Have you ever found yourself uttering self-defeating statements? Here are words I hope to never catch myself saying again: “Not to be negative but” or “I can’t” or “I need.”

If you start a sentence with “not to be negative but,” you are indeed being negative. So stop.

If you don’t have something good to say, don’t bother speaking.

“I can’t” never helps you.

For example, now I never tell myself, “I can’t afford” something. Rather I do tell myself that “I choose” not to buy that item.

I don’t want to create a world within my own mind where I can’t afford things. Therefore, I never let those words sail out of my mouth.

Lastly, saying “I need” is as bad as “I can’t.” When you need, your mindset is not rooted in a place of abundance.

I used to tell myself, “I need more great agents to join my company.”

When you have a mindset of need, you create more need. Instead, I now live in a mindset of plenty with outlooks like this:

“I am an agent magnet. I have more than I need but I am always happy to find a spot on our team for more great agents.”

  1. Negativity.

Simply put, negativity destroys businesses. Entrepreneurship requires you to see the silver lining because there always is one.

Even when competition, employees or just daily work knocks you down, find the lesson in it and count your blessings. Every great business leader and entrepreneur is a by-product of the failures they have overcome. Get over it. Rise with a smile on. It’s your job.


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